There is a quote I like by Miyamoto Musashi, and it goes like this: “It is better to be a warrior in a garden than a gardener in a war.”
I interpret that as advice to always stay ready, especially as a man. Work on your mind, your body, and also your soul.
Start and maintain a daily relationship with God. Pray! Read something every day. Watch everything with intent. Don’t just scroll as a disconnected idiot. Take care of your body by watching what you eat, what you drink, and who you have intimate relationships with. This is the bare minimum you can do to always stay ready and always be a warrior, even when you are in a garden.
Now.
The point I want to get to is one of the most interesting, beautiful, challenging, and complex things I had to understand and learn in my life.
Listen closely.
The person you needed to become to go through the war you went through and win is not going to return home with you when the war is over.
Once the battle with depression, anxiety, self-doubt, shame, humiliation, and whatever else you went through will end, because it will end, you need to leave the soldier behind. That strong, beautiful soldier you had to build and become who just won’t quit, no matter what came its way, needs to remain behind. And that is a painful process in itself.
Why do you need to leave him behind?
Well, because now you don’t have to be a soldier anymore. Now you have to be an architect and build from scratch the life you want for yourself and those you love.
You will experience some PTSD at first when the war is over. And it is normal. For a long time, everything you touched turned to ashes. But slowly, you will realize that the war is indeed over, you are back home, and you can start to rebuild with all the tools you acquired in that war. And that, my friend, is one of the most beautiful things you will experience in this life.
The mind-blowing opportunity to rebuild everything, from ashes, with God.
Wow.
Amazing!
You are always going to be a warrior in the garden. And may God help anyone who is going to test you.
But you made it. You are home. You are strong. The war is over.
Rebuild.
With God.
Amen!
With love, yours truly, Cristian.